I (Heart) the 80's

Most people vacation on an island on at an amusement park where grown men and women dress up like cartoon characters. But today, Darryl and I went on a most totally awesome trip. We went back in time to the 80's! It's totally rad, I hooked up an Atari 2600, dusted off the Sony Walkman so I can listen to "We are the World," and I think later today we're even going to go see Back to the Future in the theaters (right after some make-out time with Marcia, cause as they say in the 80's, "let's get physical.")

Darryl keeps acting all grody about it, talkin' some nonsense about Vanessa's fading away because of our time travels or some junk. Whatever, dude, she's just hungry. I say we take her to the food court at the mall! Righteous!

Well, gotta go. This lady on Press Your Luck has got three Whammies and one spin left, and she's trying to decide whether to play or pass. Talk about pressure. Be excellent to each other and party on, dudes!

P.S. Whoa, how am I writing a blog? They weren't invented yet in the 80's. Heavy! Anyways, I recorded all of our time-travel adventures on my BETA recorder, so check it out!

A gift for Vanessa

Vanessa and I are celebrating our two-week anniversary of her not being mad at me. You don't understand, that's a tough feat for me to accomplish. I saw all of her African dance performances, I read all of her poems, and I even turned down a Bosom Buddies marathon to spend a day with her in the park.

To top it all off, I'm giving her a special present tonight I got from eBay. It's a ring I bought from some guy named Spike from a city in California... Sunnydale, I believe. He says this ring is very special, and that once I put it on her finger, in no time she'll be biting at my neck. All right, I love foreplay!

I'll tell you how the date went soon. I have to go check on Marcia. She also bought some stuff from eBay from a girl named Buffy. I'll have to see what she got.

*See how Darryl's date went after giving Vanessa her present.

Sick of Shumway

Lots of strange things have happened in our home since Larry got this new TV he apparently won in a contest. First off, I fell earlier today, and I swore I heard a laugh track. And we weren't even watching a sitcom at the time, we were watching Homicide: Life on the Street!

Then, you won't believe this, but Dr. Rick Savage himself walked into our home (By the way, if you know what TV show he's in, could you tell me? I can never remember). And suddenly, in our backyard was ALF. Yeah, from the TV show ALF. I thought it would be awesome to have him live in our home, but it's not as cool as it was when you see it on TV. This guy's annoying, he brings weird pets, he broke my special collection of Barney Miller glasses, and he even tried to steal my girlfriend in front of me.

I couldn't remember what happened to ALF, cause I stopped watching ALF after the 2nd season (but then again, so did everybody else), so I called the Alien Task Force to come get him. I hope they can help, because he's actually succeeding in hooking up with my girlfriend... and Larry's too. I hope the Alien Task Force will come soon and give us some good advice. I don't think I can take another day of living with Gordon Shumway.

Oh yeah, Gordon Shumway's his real name. He likes being called that. He calls ALF his slave name.

*See what happens when two guys have ALF as their roommate.

I won a contest!

The strangest thing happened to me. I got a package in the mail from the cable company. Yeah, it sounds generic, but who cares? You'll never guess what they sent me. A brand new big-screen TV! Awesome!

Even though Darryl and I are total TV junkies, we never put out the cash to get a huge TV, so we had been watching a 13-inch television all this time. And I, for one, am tired of that. The other day, I was watching The Facts of Life, and I started getting all hot thinking I was checking out Blair Warner... turns out it was Mrs. Garrett! Darryl probably doesn't think that's so nasty though, he has a strange fetish for Charlotte Rae.

I know Marcia's not going to be too happy about this TV, so I figure I'll try to spend some time with her so she doesn't feel alienated. Hey, speaking of alienated, I know the first show I want to watch on this puppy... ALF. I love that show! But I know Darryl wants to check out that new spin-off series, Buffy the Umpire Slayer, but I think that show has catastrophe of AfterM*A*S*H proportions if I ever saw one.

Wow, two roomies sitting at home watching a big-screen TV. My life is finally starting to feel normal again.